I mistakenly flushed my lens😂

..And now, I have to read things like grandmas do☹

Mar 10, 2024

At this point, I’m not gonna complain about Nigeria anymore, cos honestly, it’s changing nothing. Tell me why my dad could only buy ten T-Shirts with over 100k on Lagos Island! As if that isn’t enough, glasses are now so expensive! Medicating them is even more expensive😪. Honestly, if you don’t use glasses, you don’t know the grace you’re actually blessed with.

grayscale photo of girl doing face palm — Photo by Henrikke Due on Unsplash

Hi again and welcome home! I hope you enjoyed the previous week’s newsletter. If you didn’t get it, you can read it here. I genuinely hope you’re doing good, because it doesn’t seem like the country’s situation is getting better anytime soon. I’ve decided to find positive lights in many of the things that happen around me. Tbh, it’s not been easy, so I still have a lot of things to rant about, but it’s been fun the past week.

There were/are so many things to celebrate this week. First off, happy International Womens’ Day to all the women and ladies out there! I really hope you were celebrated in grand style on Friday, cos there’s so much we do, that we don’t take credit for. I was celebrated sha, and I loved it🤭. Also, happy mothers’ day too🎉🎉. As a mother and a woman as well, I ‘dobale’ for you mehn. It’s not easy🙌🏽🙌🏽. This is my subtle reminder to celebrate yourself as a woman, or a mother. You sef don try abeg😗. Make sure you appreciate your mother today too💜.

Ramadan starts tomorrow and I have a sore throat😭. God, help me run this one abeg🤲🏽. I hope you’re ready sha. Even if you’re not, it’s already here😝. Ramadan Mubarak too✨.

I know I mentioned last week, that I hate Oshodi, but when you look deeper, you realise that it’s actually a crazy place, with a load of drama. I experience a lot of drama there, especially in the BRT terminal. To me, it’s so funny when I see people fighting for the bus, especially after queueing for such a long time😂. On my route, thankfully, there are very few arguments, cos we stay organised💅🏽. But there are some chaotic routes with very chaotic people. Honestly, it’s always so funny when I watch the grown-ups fighting. In the real sense of it tho, I feel those fights are always unnecessary sha. If everyone stuck to the queueing culture, there wouldn’t be all the shouting and hair pulling. At the same time, Nigerians will always be who they are and want to cut corners😪. Just don’t cut corners in front of me o. You go regret am I swear🙂😂.

Asides the funny things that happen there, there are so many things that irk me in that bus terminal. First on my list is the BRT drivers. Like, they feel so entitled. Whyyy??? They be behaving like people who can’t be controlled. Sometimes, I get the urge to say, ‘Bro, na bus you dey drive. Calm the shit down.’ But I no fit yarn am😪😂.
One thing even happened during the week. This young lady, (say 13 or 14) boarded the bus yeah, and her mum was seated. This girl had to stand, so the ground person allowed her in, without her having to tap her card.
Next thing, oga driver started shouting and crying. I’m like whyyyy??? Bro said the girl would be obstructing his driving, because she stood beside his space. Ha!!! Mind you, his space is even barricaded by a door. Uncle driver, na so e be? There was a lot of back and forth between the ground staff and the driver. Eventually, the guy let her be. This driver was nothing less than 40 years old. I really do not get why he was being so bitter🤦🏽‍♀️.

Another annoying thing with these BRT drivers is how they shamelessly extort. I really wonder if their training includes character and behaviour, cos majority of them exude ghetto-like behaviours. Yesterday, I waited 2 hours, before the bus finally came. I boarded the bus at Obalende, instead of my regular Oshodi. After I had settled in, I just heard the agbero driver start shouting repeatedly at somebody in Yoruba. He went, ‘gbe kini yen bo le!!!’ For the non-Yorubas, it means, ‘take that thing down.’ I’m surprised at why he’s shouting, so I turn to watch drama unfold. Apparently, these two guys just came back from the market on the Island, and had bought a lot of equipment, one of which was a pretty long rod.

These guys had already tapped in with their cards, so there was no way they were gonna ‘not’ board the bus. This driver legit started shouting in the bus because these guys were bringing in their rod. Ahn ahn, is it a crime ni? These two guys were begging the driver o to allow them take their things in. This man didn’t even budge and kept shouting. Las las, they had to bribe him with about 2K to allow them take their things in. After they had already payed their bus fare😪🤦🏽‍♀️. It was so stupid honestly. I was even clear from the start that the driver's sole intent was to extort the poor guys.

I might just write a letter to LAMATA to look into these drivers, cos it’s getting really out of hand.😑

BRT and its werey aside, is it just me, or does it seem like there’s a crazy scarcity of spoons in restaurants? Or is it just the restaurants I visit? On Monday, a team member bought food for me, from a restaurant we had never tried. Thank you Grace🫶🏽. I was so hungry, but I didn’t have time to eat in the office, so I decided I’d eat on the bus. Fast forward to getting on the bus… Omo, these people didn’t put a spoon in their takeaway pack😭. Just serviette😪. I had to wait till I got home to eat that food. Food that was bought for me at 4:30pm, I had no choice than to eat it at 7pm💀.

On Wednesday, I decided to take Ice cream for the last time, before Ramadan. On my way home, I bought ice cream and chicken pie from Chicken Republic. I made sure to check that there was cutlery in the serviette. Yes, I felt a plastic and guessed it was a spoon. I got to the terminal, and decided to dig in. These people put a fork in the damn serviette☹. Fgs I didn’t order ice spag now😭. I had no choice than to use the fork o.

Share Maryam’s Substack

Still on food, what do you think about this Buchymix blender innovation thing? It’s all over the streets of Instagram, with food content creators bastardising the use of blenders. These people just conjure up anything and the next thing you hear, ‘ Now, I’m going to use my Buchymix blender to blend it into a smooooth paste…’ (Imagine it in a tiny female voice and you get it right😂) I think the height of it for me was when this lady blended ponmo and used it to cook noodles. Ma’am?😭 What is thattttt??? I get the fact that these guys are trying to advertise the uses of this particular blender, but please, can they actually stop with the miscreation of food? What is garri yoghurt abeg?💀😂 If you know a food content creator, kindly send my warning. It’s gon’ be bloody soon o!😂

Random thought, but have you ever thought about why poor people give birth to so many kids? I mean the ones who have no source of livelihood and beg on the bridges and stuff.. Personally, I don’t seem to understand the logic behind it. I feel it’s really unfair to create lives, when you don’t have the resources to cater for these lives and then, subject them to horrors like begging at very tender ages☹. If you know you don’t have resources to take care of a child, then use contraceptives!!!! If you can’t buy or use contraceptives, then abeg, don’t have s*x 😑.

… And that’s a wrap for the week

This new week, learn how to respect boundaries, don't invalidate people's emotions and be the best version of yourself as possible.✨

Any opportunity you get, be kind
But anybody wey deserve deafing, deaf am abeg😂

Btw, I wrote this entire newsletter without my glasses. I kinda flushed one of my lens down the toilet😭. Without my glasses, I basically share eyesight with a bat. I deserve kudos nawww🤭😂

Byeee😗

Signed..
Dami🌹

Dami's Discoveries

Discussion about this post